PrettyLittleRanch

WHAT. A. DAY. I felt an incredible calm. Much of my anxiety and fears were washed away and I was able to take each moment as it came. A couple of things contributed to this 1) my mom reminded me that he was in the best possible place, if for some reason there was an issue 2) My MIL talked about her going into one of her boys procedures with the mind set of “Everything is going to be just fine” and 3) God’s grace in answering prayers! I believe whole heartedly in the power of prayer. Friends, family, friends of family, and family of friends were praying for our sweet boy. My fear and anxiety had been through the roof over the past two weeks.  However this morning, I knew in my heart everything was going to be ok, I had found the best possible surgeons, and he was healthy going into surgery; Everything was going to be fine.

Pre-op. As confident as I was, I did not want to let this baby out of my arms. I knew what to expect after surgery and never want my babies to be in pain. Difficulty coming out of anesthesia, bruising, swelling, risk of infection, potential need for revision were all concerns I had been made aware of prior to surgery. However minimal, there are always risk for surgery. We arrived to the hospital by 5:45, got him signed in, and waited.  This baby, despite not eating since midnight and completely out of his routine, was happy! He talked and smiled, then had a little nap in my arms just before the anesthesiologist took him back to the OR.

Surgery. We were told the surgery, single suture Craniectomy Synostosis, would take less than an hour; however prep and post op would take much longer. We had a patient/parent liaison, a monitor in the waiting room,  and an app on our phone that updated us periodically. There was never any guessing on what stage they were in all along the way.

The patient liaison came out and said they were just about done (and not to worry when they drs came out  and ask us to go in a separate room, it’s just for privacy). A short time later Dr. Lam and Dr. Buchanan came out with smiles!! They let us know that everything went according to plan and he was doing great. He lost a little bit of blood, so they did give him a little bit of ours (Nick and I both did a directed donation while we were in for Carter’s pre-op the week prior). Dr. Lam explained that he would have a few “lumps and bumps” but those will smooth out as he grows. They let us know we could go see him shortly. Then the fear of the recovery set in.

Post-op. We got to go back to the PICU where a nurse and the anesthesiologists were monitoring his vitals. He was having “bradies” like he had in the NICU. I had expected all that I saw: wires, IVs, swelling, and the incisions… but the difficulty of seeing your own baby like this is hard to discribe. All the worries and fears, paired with the relief of it being over.  I just wanted to hold him, but at the same time terrified of disturbing him. He had three IV lines, one for fluids, an artierial line monitored his heart, and one in his foot where he received blood. Once he began to wake up, I attempted to nurse. He has a harsh scratchy cry from the tube. Nursing was unsuccessful, so I opted to give him pedialite.  He took that well and I held him until it was time to transport him to a regular room.

Recovery. The next few hours he slept or cried, so we tried to keep him as comfortable as possible. His cry was harsh, scratchy, and heartbreaking. Swelling and bruising were not near as bad as I had anticipated, I feared it was still early. He had lots of cuddles and Tylenol for pain.

Cuddles and Smiles. Nick spent the afternoon with Charlie and Nonnie (Nick’s mom) at the Children’s Museum. My mom had been Charlie that morning, and with us for the afternoon. Carter had been awake off and on, but still not himself, but when Nick came in the door and said hello to him Carter just lit up. He smiled for the first time and at that point Nick and I knew he was going to be just fine, and so we’re we.

Going home. Carter was doing well and we were able to take him home the following day. I was a bit worried, but the PAs assured me they expected him to do just fine. His nurse was amazed at how great he looked and said she had never seen a baby look this good after this surgery. So, we loaded this sweet baby up and headed home.

Well, not straight home. We stopped and got him fitted for his helmet, more on that later. Over the next few days this baby taught me what it means to be resilient! His head shape was noticeably different and was recovering beautifully.

xoxo

Lauren